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Superlative Power of True Love

Love unite but sin separates.

Love unites to the point that two cant be separated.  Love unties til two people are close and forever continues to draw them ever closer in this life and the next.

The Superlative Power of True Love draws a couple so close that they cant be separated like the creature in Job 41:15 who’s “back has rows of shields tightly sealed together.”

This same closeness the bride has with her husband by the end of the Love Song.  For she says they are sealed one to the other.  Because everything he thinks or wills for her she does.  Like or arm does everything we want it to.  She says,

Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm.  For love is as strong as death.”  Song 8:5

The superlative power of the strength of their love is here on display!  Death has power to sow discord, separate and cause pain.  True Love communicated to our heart by the indwelling Holy Spirit has power to unite, harmonize and cause joy.

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My point of this blog is to extol the power of Love on display in Solomon’s Song of Songs. By doing so exalt God who is Love and Almighty, the source of their love for each other.  Seeing a marriage in such sweet and delightful harmony ought to get you to think “how is that possible”.   You should be in shock.  If you really understood the sinful nature of all humans and the inability of both all men and woman it would be a complete shock and utter amazement for you to see a couple living in perfect harmony.

The greater the difficulty overcome the greater power is on display.  It takes an act of God who is love to work in and through a marriage like that one between a great type of Jesus Christ and his bride.

Question?  Do I think that it is possible on earth for two born again people to have such a perfect marriage as the couple in the Song did?

In short,  no I do not believe you can find a perfect marriage on earth.  But…

Yes I do believe that you can find two mature believers functioning in near and nearer perfect harmony.

I do believe that Solomon was gifted with unmeasurable wisdom and an unquenchable love therefore you won’t ever find any man ever that had or will have such wisdom.  God’s Holy Spirit would empower certain individuals for specific goals.  God dwelt in Moses giving him humility more than any other man.  God dwelt in Sampson giving him physical strength more than any other man to display the power of God through him.  God also gave Solomon “unmeasurable wisdom”.   Now if you had unmeasurable wisdom can you imagine the skill you would have to draw your wife closer to yourself!!  Not only did he have unmeasurable wisdom but also a superlative Love and Holy Jealousy that were unquenchable and priceless.  For his love was

as strong as death,
    its jealousy unyielding as the grave.
It burns like blazing fire,
    like a mighty flame.
Many waters cannot quench love;
    rivers cannot sweep it away.
If one were to give
    all the wealth of one’s house for love,
    it would be utterly scorned.”  Song 8:5-6

Seeing the couple love each other and the extreme closeness of the relationship that is achieved at the end lead me to believe that each person received and extra ordinary amount of God’s Spirit than you and I or anyone living in the 20th century.  Yes, the manner in which the Spirit of God dwells in people in the OT verses the NT may be different but the same Love that in-dwelt them also indwells all true believers today.

Enoch walked with God and God took him to heaven.   Enoch’s walk with God, I believe was extraordinary.  So also the couple in the Love Song were so in agreement in their idea of love that their walk with each other was tighter than any other couple except the tightness and closeness of Christ and His Bride, the Church.

So I do not believe that a marriage could function as sweetly as a perfect heart and arm would type a crazy amount of words with perfect accuracy.  But I do believe a marriage could function like my heart and arm as I learned to type.  First letter by letter, then words then faster and faster with better accuracy.  So also a Marriage with the Holy Spirit indwelling each person should have a tendency to grow and not ultimately fall apart.

As I learned to type in high school my heart and hands learned to function together to type better and better.  So it is also in marriage.  The sweetness and harmony in it should grow.

Why illustrate of Love that can’t be accomplished here on earth unless gifted like Solomon?  I mean no man can live up to this the standard at which Solomon who was gifted with unmeasurable wisdom has set.

Love in its more completed state is seen!!

A foreign love in its most complete state is seen and delighted in.

Love in the Song is more delighted in than seeing Adam love his wife before the fall.

A restored marriage has a more peculiar beauty than beholding the Love of Adam to Eve before the fall.

1  Its a greater work of God in the heart to soften a hard heart verses keep a good and holy heart holy.   God keeps the holy angels holy, which is why they are called elect angels for God keeps them from falling.  But to let a good and holy human because sinful of his own will then restore such a person is a greater work of God.  To not let them get harder hearts is a Mercy of God due to His Love.

2  In a marriage with sin God’s love of forgiveness can be seen.  In a Marriage without sin as Adam and Eve before the fall, God’s attribute of Mercy would not be seen.   Without objects to be Merciful to no Mercy can be seen and delighted in thus the Glory of God which is all of who He is would be seen not so much in its entirety by Adam before the fall as it is for us after the fall.

So when the daughters of Jerusalem stare at the sunburnt Shulammite woman they are thinking that it would be impossible for her to have a sweet harmonious relationship with Israel’s Holy Anointed one when by all outward appearances she was unholy.  What does light have in common with darkness?  Nothing.  Yet she says she is fit for a holy union or in her words “lovely” Song 1:5  This word for lovely is also translated beautiful or “fit” meaning she is fit and suitable for a holy union due to the Love of God dwelling in her heart.  How did she go from being unfit for a holy to union to being fit for a holy union?  The end of the Song gives us that answer.  It was because she had God’s Almighty Love dwelling in her heart.  Song 8:6-7.

 

Its just not humanly possible for such a relationship to happen.  No wonder so many people say that Solomon made up the Song and the people in it didn’t really do the things in it.  I mean its like a fairy tale love story with a perfect ending.   That just doesn’t happen.  Or last least I haven’t seen of or heard a couple who live together in perfect harmony like your heart and arm.  Your heart and arm function sweetly together.  They are one.  The heart and body are united and operate in sweet harmony unless you have some neurological disorder.

Image having an arm that you told to pick up a glass of water and give it to a thirsty person next to you and your arm took the glass of water and dumped it out in front of him.  Or image having a perfect king say to you that you should love your neighbor while in his kingdom and in your heart you agree that you should love your neighbor but instead you dishonor all authority, hate your neighbor, commit adultery with his wife in your mind over and over again, steal from them, lie to cover it up and covet all their goods.  In this scenario there is nothing wrong with the holy King but their is a huge disconnect between what the people ought to be doing and what they were doing.  Same as the hand.  The hand ought to be doing what the heart tells it to.  The faculties of the heart being the mind, will and emotions of our soul.  These facilities are tainted with sin and evil at birth.  The mind has knowledge.  The mind is not born with a true sense of the knowledge of Love.  Your will until born again has not the true will to love as it ought.  And your primary emotion, Love, is twisted toward self more than it is toward God there hatred and enmity will reign until born again from above.

Now imagine that only the Superlative Power of True Love in the heart being the only person or power that can enable a falling human being to love God, his neighbor, his wife and his enemies properly.

So there is your answer.  How is it possible for a couple to have a sweet harmonious relationship that nothing could quench?   How is it possible for two enemies to become one in both body and heart?

Both must possess the Almighty Power of True Love!!

They have it and Him.  They have God who is Love dwelling in them.  The power of God’s love is clearly on display in the relationship

Love draws two people or being closer together but sin or any disobedience to God separates us from Him who is love and also separates us from others.

Adam and Eve were sinless when married.  Their love for each other had no sin in it.  Though they were capable of sin they had no sin until Satan tempted Eve to disobey God and she ate the forbidden fruit.

After eating the forbidden fruit Adam and Eve were still married or one but the true love in the relationship was completely gone and selfishness reigned.  Their hearts had completely lost the sense of the true feeling of love.  Sin had separated them from the superlative delightfulness of experiencing a close relationship with God.  They were fill with shame and guilt and tried to cover themselves and make things better by the work of their own hands in putting fig leaves over themselves to cover their shame.

Yet the work of their own hands couldn’t take away their guilt and shame.  But the covering of a innocent substitute would be sufficient for the Job.  A spotless Lamb provided by God would provide the clothing needed to take away the guilt and shame.  Not only would God have to provide a substitute to suffer death for them but also God would have to restore the nature and heart of man in order for them to Love God and other’s again.

God is love.

God the Father Loves.

God the Son Love.

Love is the 3rd Person of the Trinity.   The Holy Spirit is Love.

In order for a true restoration of a loving and harmonious relationship between man and woman in marriage God the Holy Spirit must dwell in them.

When you believe in Jesus and repent of your sin then God the Holy Spirit had been given to you when you believed.  Ephesians 1:13-14  “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.”

Though I don’t know the religion of the bride in the Song before she was a true Jew in heart.  We can see that she was being treated like a “veiled woman”  or prostitute.   A prostitute would veil herself in shame to hide her true identity in public.  She did not want to be treated like someone continuing in sin next to other holy daughters of Jerusalem who were experiencing the Gracious love, peace and rest of God in His Kingdom during Solomon’s reign.

One of Solomon’s wives was Naahmah.   Im not saying that the woman in the Song is Naahmah,  I just using her as an example to illustrate that two people with differing religions cant truly function like the woman and Solomon did in the Song. Naahmah was an Ammonite.  An Ammonite didn’t love the True God.  She worshipped idols.  Unless she was born again she would have the sinful tendency to lead the relationship or marriage.  Unless Solomon was born again then he would also be cursed to tend to not lead wisely but selfishly.  So Solomon, the husband is the leader or should be like the heart leading in telling the arm what to do.  If she was a true Ammonite that had no true sense of the Love of God then she would not be able to fulfill her role in the marriage as God intended.

An Ammonite would have love to some thing other than YAWEH.  True Love has the Same Love to the Same One and only true God and LORD Jesus Christ.

An Ammonite would worship “Milcom”  and “Molech”.   These were their gods.  Since God is Love anyone who has His Love in their heart will also worship Him.  Those who don’t have the Love of God in them will worship something other than Him who is Love.  The power of God is on display in a most glorious manner when He overcomes our greatest loves in this world when a greater more delightful love for Himself is sensed in our hearts.  This flame of love is as the Song of songs says it is

A flame above all other flames.  Superlative in power due to its most excellent nature and qualities.

An Ammonite would have to have a change of mind from worshiping false gods to worshiping the true God.   Knowledge of the true God would have to be learned and love to the True God would have to be graciously given by God to indwell the new believer in the true God.

Once love to God is renewed in the heart then a growing sweeter and more harmonious relationship with God, spouse and others will naturally ensue.

Superlative Power of Love.

I titled this blog the “Superlative Power of Love”

There are certain context in which varying kinds of love are on display.

God’s common love is on display when he sends rain to the earth.   The blessing of rain is enjoyed by both the evil and good people due to God’s love of beneficence.   Yet God’s love of Complacency is in His Children that bear His holy image upon their hearts.  God shows love to the rich and poor, ignorant and smart and all races, therefore God’s love is unconditional.  God’s special love as apposed to common love is to His Sons bride, who alone receives forgiveness of sin and a new heart.

The Song illustrates of love between a born again king and a born again woman who was being treated like an enemy of God because she was.  Yet, at the outset of the Song she is behaving as one would who was born again.  Being born again is the precursor to a growing sweeter and more harmonious relationship that pleases God, through union and communion with His Son.

The indwelling Love of God in the heart is stronger and more powerful to overcome the sinful tendencies of a hard heart.

Oil and water don’t mix yet if there was a power that could unite the two to make them one we would stand amazed and in awe.  She was a unbeliever and he was a believer.  She was oil and he was the water.  Yet if oil were changed to a substance that mixed with water then the two could become one.   God had the Almighty power to change her heart so the two could become one.

If a Being could make a dark heart shine with love we would count that Being quite powerful.

For two who were truly enemies to become friends is quite the accomplishment.  She calls her beloved husband a “friend” above all other friends.  They are on the same side.  She went from being against the Messiah to being for Him.  She went from  hating to loving Him.  She had a change of mind, will and emotions about God’s holy anointed one, Solomon.

It take more power to create one spark of holy light in a hard dark heart then it does to make a thousand suns out of nothing.  It takes the death of God’s Son to bring about restoration of a lost poor and blind soul.

Christ made of display of a great power at the cross when he disarmed our enemy Satan.

And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross.
In both life and marriage Paul wanted us to know God’s power and resurrection power.
“I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection”
When a dead soul comes to life again like the bride in the Song then resurrection power is felt and understood.
There is great power on display in the marriage in the Song yet there is greater power on display at the cross.   My prayer for you.
” I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, 19 and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms”

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Saved in 2000 at age 27. Nearly immediately I fell in love with the Song and grew very fast the first two years memorizing large portions of scripture purifying my mind the started chewing on meat to soon and struggled for 12 years and Christ has me on track like always but I just took the long way around and now I love leading others closer to Christ by seeing His love reflected in Solomons love for an enemy slave girl.

I have experienced God's love to me in the Song in ways that words can't express. There are many portion of the Word where she experiences extra ordinary outpouring of the Holy Spirit of God. If you have a burning desire for a close intimate relationship with God by experiencing His Love to you over and over again at greater and greater heights, depths, lengths and breaths then The Song of Songs is where you need to be.

I can help you with this process of Growing in the experience of God's love. As of 7-23-16 I have experienced everything prior to chapter 8. The Song of Song is progressive in experience. Meaning that if you are mature then you can experience the joys and extraordinary outpourings of God's Love shed abroad in your heart.

If you are not so mature then the delights in the first chapter of the Song will satisfy your thirst for experiencing the Love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Many Christian are living in sin because they do not know how to experience God's love and get hooked on Loving Him. It feels good to be loved and to love Him. His burden is not heavy and His yoke is light, Jesus said in Matt. 10:28

I believe God wants to use me to help beautify His Bride through the Song of Solomon.

If you see the book literally you will not understand nor grasp the Love God has for you. If you see the book and the verses in it relating to Christ's love to you then I would love to show you how to experience this Love to the fullest. I will pray for you daily and guide you every step of the way.

16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

I grew up going to church but was a hypocrite. I lived my life how I chose but went to church on Sunday because my family went.

Mom and Dad divorced when I was about 5.

About this time I was sexually abused by "Bob" a made up name. This incident changed my life for the worst. I had no clue how to deal with it.

As I got older I grew in my hatred for Bob. I didn't blame anyone of my family because I was to young to know any better. Some of what happened during the abuse was in a bathroom. So overtime I would use the bathroom and look at my private parts that night would replay in my mind. My hatred for Bob would continue to grow each time.

Now I know this only happened to me one night. I can't image the pain other's go through who have had this happen to them over and over. Even as I write this now I cry with many tears for those hurting. God love you even though you may not know it or feel it. Go to Him in your time of need.

I was a really bad teenager. I only cared about myself and not even my family. I always came first in my mind. Even at the expense of hurting others. I was growing in my hatred for God by now.

I was going to church and was learned that God was in control. I thought well, if God was in control then He must have let me be sexually abused. I didn't understand this, How could a good and loving God allow this. I hated Him for it. My hatred for Bob grew as well. I was still using the bathroom and memories kept coming back. My heart grew even harder for Bob and God. As far as I was concerned God would have nothing to do with my life so I lived even worse. I thought I would be in jail or dead and I really didn't care, I thought it could be much worse than reliving your painful past over and over again. Little did I know that God's plan later would be to use these events to give me a burning passion for the closest most intimate love relationship with Himself through Christ mainly through the love poem in the Song of Songs in the Bible.

I remember hating Bob so much that the only thing that would relieve my pain was actually thinking he would suffer forever for what he did. I grew so much in my hatred for him that I had to continue to think that he would get even worse than what I imaged before. After some time I would only be relieved of hatred for him unless I thought he would burn in a hotter and hotter hell for all the suffering he put me through.

I never told my mom or family what happened, although I think some of them knew something had happened.

I grew up quite rebellious and even went to jail at the age of 20. I was living the fast life pursuing all my sinful desires and wanting more. It never seemed to be enough. I was quite happy in my sin but I just wanted more of it.

I lived life thinking I would die at a young age, riding motorcycle and living on the edge put me in the hospital many times and I should have been dead.

California at age 26.

I moved to California for a job opportunity at the age of 27. While trying to figure out what radio stations to program in my car, I ran across a RC Sproul talking about "people who have the faith that saves and people who only say that have faith" only the people who have the faith that saves will go to heaven. I thought "I don't think I have the faith that saves because my life was so bad." I searched the scriptures to try to get this faith. I found a church and thought people there could help me get this faith that saves. All along God kept showing me how sinful I was and that I deserved punishment from Him for living my life hating Him.

One weekend I read Matthew, Mark, Luke and John desperately trying to find out how to get this faith that saves. By now I knew that if you had the faith that saves that Jesus would be saving you from a life of sin. I still liked my sin and Jesus sure wasn't saving me from a life of sin, so I rightly concluded that I didn't have the faith that saves.

By the time I got to John, I saw "believe" everywhere. John 3:16 and other verses and wow the whole book was written so that you may believe. John 20:31 "these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name." So at night I would pray "I believe Jesus died for me, I believe, I believe. This was just an intellectual belief. I knew that in history and the Bible that Jesus died for everyone, so I believed it. But this belief did not change my life.

I would go on night after night saying the same prayer only to wake up the next day wanting to fulfill my sinful desires. The prayer wasn't working so I started to word it different each time hoping some prayer would work. After about 2 weeks of this I was fed up with it all, nothing was happening. I still was living in my sin and wanted more of it. A Christian hates their sin and does something about it, and certainly they don't continue to make plans to sin. The prayers weren't working so I gave up. I thought to myself "God, I tried with all my might, I searched the Scriptures, went to church, read the Bible and prayed all to no avail. If Im going to be saved your going to have to do it because I tried."

So I quit praying but still the Bible kept calling me so I read more. 3 Days later I was laying in a tanning bed and God convicted me really hard that I had offended Him by the life I was living. I was so scared of God, where could I run. You can't hide from God. It seemed like forever that I was under these terrors of being punished by a Holy Angry God. This lasted about 10 minutes then this is how I understood it. God let me understand that all that anger that He had for me for all my sin should come my way but He had poured that anger out on Jesus 2,000 years ago. I immediately started weeping an couldn't stop for about 20 minutes. All the sins that I could think of I confessed for that 20 minutes one after another after another, I was so sorrowful and grieved it physically hurt inside.

After I stopped crying I thought that was the weirdest thing that ever happened. I walked out of the tanning salon and stood outside and everything seemed so beautiful, the tree's, the birds, even the air seemed pleasant. Now I was really wondering what was going on.

I pondered all of this as I drove to work that day. I brought my Bible to work and was thinking what am I doing, I want to take my Bible to work so I can read it. As soon as I got to work I started reading my Bible. I couldn't believe what I was reading!! It all was so wonderful. It felt so good to just read my Bible. My client showed up and as I was training them the only thing I could think about was getting back to my Bible. I read all night and slept about 2 hours and was reading again.

I had sinful things in my apartment and I rounded everything evil up and threw it in the garbage. It was weird I was thinking but it felt good so I left it all in the garbage. I called my girlfriend to break it up and she thought I had another girl, I said no, I just think this is wrong we shouldn't be sleeping together. She didn't understand so I told her I was a Christian now and she still thought I had another girlfriend. She said "Im glad your a Christian, so am I" I thought to myself, "I have a strong conviction that sleeping together is wrong and she thought it was okay" I wondered how she could think that. Anyway we broke up.

I kept reading my bible and repenting, there was so much to repent of and I had lived a very sinful life. I was a thief for some part of my life and all the people I stole from kept coming to mind. I owed so much money. I was instantly in debt about $80,000. As I could I paid them back. As of 7-18-2016 I still owe about $25,000 but it sure is a joy to be paying them back.

The first week of being saved a car just about ran me over, they hit me but I wasn't hurt at all. The guy in the car felt so bad. I just looked at him and said "God bless you and have a great day, I am okay" smiled at him and moved on. Now I was really wondering what was going on because I normally would have cussed him out left and right and instead of cussing I blessed him. That was so weird. But again it felt good. I learned to do good by what my conscience told me was good and that it felt good. I got hooked on this feeling good by doing good and did it more often.

About two weeks after being saved I thought of Bob. I immediately prayed for him, something like "Lord help him.." then I stopped praying and said out loud "What am I doing?" I'm praying for a man that I hated my whole life, but it feels good and right, so I did it again. I stopped again midway in the prayer and started pacing around. I was trying to make sense of what was going on and couldn't figure it out. But again it made me happy to pray for him so I did. Bob would often come to mind when I went to the bathroom and each time I would pray for Him. The more I did this the less weird it got. And the greater my love grew for him.

I started memorizing large portions of scripture and this was wonderful because it felt like the words were cleaning my mind and as Proverbs 2:10 "For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul." I wanted more and more of this pleasantness. So I memorized even more and the joy got more and more.

Then this life changing advice came:

A friend from church told me to find a book of the Bible and really understand it. Read through the Bible and pick one and read it over and over and study it and really get it. So I started in Genesis and read through. When I got to Proverbs I really liked it so I thought that would be the book. I started by memorizing all of Proverbs chapter 3. After that I thought maybe there is a better book than Proverbs. So I read on. Then I came to Song of Solomon. I read it with quite some confusion. It wasn't as good as the other books, I didn't know why. So I bought a commentary on it. George Burrowes commentary on the Song of Solomon.

In the commentary I found that George and other saw the book as illustrating God's love to the Church. And not only illustrating it but displaying the Love of Christ better than any other book. This caught my attention big time, because I was having a burning desire for a closer relationship with God and desperately learning about His Love so that I could Love God. You see I had hated Him for so long that God used that old hard heart to spur me on in loving Him. I so much did not want to hate God anymore that I was on fire to learn to Love Him as much and as fast as possible. So here was a book that would help me do that. So I landed on the Song of Solomon. I committed to learning as much of this book as possible.

I memorized the first chapter and would repeat it often throughout the day. I didn't know much of what I was repeating but it sure made me happier and on fire for God. I grew so fast repeating the first chapter over and over again all day, like a dozen times a day at least. It felt so good and I never found any other book that caused me to weep so much. I would often weep everyday just reading it. I was to immature to know what was going on. Even though it hurt to weep so much, I felt like my heart was being cleansed from the filth that was in it by repeating it over and over again so I did. As I read the commentary I understood more and more. What God was doing in me through the Song was greater and faster than any other portion of Scripture so I tended to stay there often. I was so excited about God that I thought it funny that other's in church weren't the same way. Some where happy but it seemed most of them didn't seem to care much about God. They would talk about work, football the weather. The only thing I wanted to talk about was Jesus and God and how can I grow closer to Him.

About this time there was a mission trip to Ireland.

I started to have convictions that I should try to find Bob and witness to him. I kept praying for him but how could he be saved if he hadn't heard the Gospel that has power unto salvation. So I asked family if they had any information. Like me before, my family hated him and thought he deserved hell. After some time I got his name but no location or phone number. Either they didn't know where he was or didn't want to tell me. I prayed some more and then started to get stronger convictions to do something about finding Bob.

So I went on the internet and typed in "his name and child molestation sex offender court" thinking that some court record would have some info leading to where I may find him" I even talked to a private eye and he couldn't help. So I googled some key words and spent hours each day looking through each page. I believed it was God's will for me to witness to Bob. I wanted him to be saved. Really bad. So much so that I thought God would save Bob if I were to witness to him. So I didn't stop searching for him. I kept my computer on each day and went page by page. It took two years to go through about 15,000 pages but I found someone who matched his name in a prison for molesting his grandchildren. I wrote the prison and he wrote back. All kinds of emotions went through my body when I saw his letter from the jail. I didn't open it right away but two hours later God gave me enough courage to face my fears again and I opened the letter. He admitted to being the one who molested me. We wrote back and forth I told him I was angry before but now I was saved and that I loved him and believed God wanted me to talk to him. He read my letters over and over again. I shared the gospel in each one.

I got mad at Bob 2x. Once he said that he love me. I got really angry with him. He didn't love me. That night it was hard to love Bob, I had to call a friend to pray for me to repent, after he prayed I felt greater love for Bob. Then I wrote him back saying "I'm sorry but you can't say that you loved me. You did not love me you lusted after me." He admitted he didn't love as he should have and admitted that it was lust and sinful. Finally some conviction. Yet I only thought he was saying that because I was being nice to him. All his family had left him and he said I was the only "friend" he had.

Wether or not it was true Bob said that he had cancer in his arm and that the help the prison gives was not enough and if he had money he could see a different doctor and get help. I sent him some money and since I was in jail before I knew what it was like to be in there without money, so I sent him money.

About 4-5 months in the economy went down, it was 2008. Work was hard. I still sent him money and I had to work harder. This was a really good lesson for me because I had to "work hard for the benefit of someone who did not deserve it." This was one of the greatest blessing ever because I realized with great certainty that Jesus was in me. This is what Jesus did. Jesus worked his whole life for me and I didn't deserve it!! Christ was in me! This was one of the best feelings ever and it put me in worship for months.

Then a mission trip to Croatia.

Each time I had to leave my business and amazing as it is I was completely okay each time. I am a self employed personal trainer and it is normally absurd to just leave and start over, but each time I had enough work within 2 weeks of coming back. This is a flat out miracle. I trusted God to provide and he did. How many people can start up a business in 2 weeks. Only with the help of God. God was teaching me early on in my walk that as long as I did what He wanted me to do then I had nothing to worry about.

About 3 years saved now.

I Taught the 4 year old's at church Sunday morning for 10 years.

Left my business 2x for mission trips and God miraculously provided when I came back.

I taught 5 x a week plus held a job.

Sunday morning to the kids.
Sunday night with the 5th graders
Friday afternoons at Good News Clubs. Sponsored by Child Evangelism Fellowship.
Friday Nights with the Kids teaching through Pilgrims Progress, I did this 2x
Teaching Monday afternoons at a nursing home. I taught through the Song of Songs once then John, then Romans then back to the Song again! I love the Song of Songs.
I grew up hating God for what happened to me, and now I love Him because He first loved me. My passion is for children to grow up loving God and not hating Him.

My other passion which has become ever greater is to help others see the Love of Christ to His Church in the Song of Songs!!

I would love to help you, just let me know and I will lead you and pray for you.

God demonstrates His love to us in sending His one and only Son to suffer in our place, taking our sins upon Himself so that whoever believes they get to heaven because of what He did for us will not perish but have everlasting life.

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