The spouses estate in desertions though seemingly miserable, is indeed profitable.
4. Fourthly, these desertions are profitable to try the truth of our love.
And the trials of our love shows us the faults of it, and showing them calls up on us to amend them. The husband of the soul will see wether his spouse love him with a wife, or of a harlot. The love of a harlot loves a man only for his gifts, and so in truth loves not the man, but the gifts. And though this be secretly true, when by outward fashion she seems to love him, yet it is manifestly true, when the gifts cease, for then her love to the man also ceases.
But the true wife loves her husband, even for himself and by him without gifts, yea she loves his gifts for his sake, for she would nor take the same gifts from another man. Yea the true love of a wife goes some degree further; for she does not only love her husband when he gives no gifts, neither does she only love his gifts for his sake, but she loves him when he is absent from her, even when she is without both his presence and his gifts; for even then the memory of him is precious to her. Song 5:10ff She calls to remembrance his perfections, his virtues, and his loves. And yet the true love of a wife goes further; for she loves her husband, even when he chides her, though in that case a husband seems to be more absent being at home, than a husband pleased being from home, Page 145
All these do the true spiritual love of the spouse perform unto Christ, and Christ delights to see them performed. Christ Jesus loves his wife with true love, for he has laid down his true blood and life for her. John 15:13 and greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his beloved. Now Christ thus truly loving his wife, he expects a return of true and unfained love from his wife: And that it may be tried to be true, or amended and made true if it be not so, these trials are sent to her in these desertions.
And indeed in most of the degrees of love are we often faulty, the flesh having often too great a part and influence in our love. For the flesh as mainly for things present and palpable, and like Thomas is wholly for seeing and feeling. And hence it is that our love dotes so much on the gifts of Christ Jesus, that it cools even to Christ Jesus himself, Without his gifts. We are all for Christ light, and knowledge, for his kisses and embracements, for his honey and his wine, for his sweetness and ravishings: and without theses Christ is a dry and loathed husband, as Manna to the fleshly Israelites was dry and loathed food. But when it is so with us, how far are we short of those higher degrees of love, even of that love that loves Christ being absent and hid out of sight, or that loves him being present in that utmost absence of anger, chastisement, and seeming enmity.
How far short are we of that cannanite woman, that kissed rid rod of discipline, and made love out of those reproaches, whereby Christ seemed to drive her away: But since it is so, is it not high time for Christ to remove his gifts, to whom our hearts are removed from Christ, that so our hearts ma again be removed to Christ from them; It is a right proper cure of this adulterous love, to remove those things with which love did adulterate, that so the right object of our best love may be sought and found, and constantly proposed. And surely this cure is profitable to our souls, as it is pleasing also to the husband of souls, for by it Christ has more interest in the soul, and the soul in Christ. And if this be the fruit of desertions, then you are a gainer by desertions.
But that you may be sure to gain by them, be sure to learn that which they teach you: they teach you that Christ is better than His gifts, and that Christ’s love is better than the gifts of his love. Therefore learn especially to fasten they love on Christ, and next on his love; and think yourself happy enough in having them, though you have nothing but them: yea know also that you have them, even when you have them not; they are yours when you see or see not that they are yours. He and his love see you, when you see them not, yea they love you, when you feel them not; and he and his love are better than the seeing and feeling of him and his love; and it is better for you that they are yours, than that they do appear to be yours. Yea, it is good for you sometimes, that they do not appear to be yours, that you may love them better then their appearing to be yours; and this love do you learn even from their not appearing.
Yea, further, Christ and his lover are yours, even when he chides and chastises you, for it is his very love that chides and chastens you, And he does it to purge you blemishes, to try and exercise you virtues, and among others, this excellent love which loves him chastening. Therefore though he kill you, do you trust in him and love him, for He that loves you does so to manifest his love to you and gave His own life for you, may well be trusted with your life. For his own life was infinitely better then you life; and he that gave so precious a life for thy good, will not take so mean a life from you but for thy good. Hence it is that even by loosing you life you will find it, and you will find it with him, for whom you looketh it for, for you will find it hid with Christ in God. And when Christ which is you life shall appear then will this hid life appear with Him; but not such a frail, and base life as that which you gave for him; but a glorious, immortal, and incorruptible life, will that be which he will give unto you.
Therefore at all times and in all estates, even in darkest desertions, and greatest sufferings, trust him whose love turns all things to good, unto his beloved, even death unto life. For be thou assured that this Almighty Husband, out of this eater will bring meat, and out of this strong one will bring forth sweetness. He himself broke the gates and bars of death, and carried them away, and so made a way open for us to eternal life.
He quickened himself when he died a universal death, even when all our deaths were included in his death. And as we all died in his death, so in his quickening and rising, do we all rise again; as the universal death of the head is given particularly to all the members, so shall the universal resurrection of the Head, be also particularly communicated to the members. Much more easily in the desertions of this life, which are a kind of sowings, plowing the heart, and seeming deaths, will he give you life again, when you have learned by them that which you would not learned without them. When you love Christ alone, when you love him hiding himself, and chastising you, then he that said to the woman, o moan great is thy faith, be it unto you even as you will:
He will say to the spouse, o woman great is your love, be it unto you as you will. Thou willest him most, be it unto thee as thou will. For when you will him most, you will have him whom you wiliest most. He will come to you, He will come much unto you. And your later end will be more than the beginning. By wanting him, will you have him more, then you had before you wanted him, Because by wanting him, you do love him more, then you did when you had him.
5. Fifthly, these Desertions are profitable to the soul, by teaching her patience; and by making patience to bring forth her kindly fruits waiting and attendance.
The husband of the soul is a King of Glory, and he will sometimes expect the honor and service of patient attendance. he is a free agent, and his Spirit bloweth when, as well as where he wishes. And to a free agent there is due a waiting patience: He that gives freely, gives when himself will give, and not still when the receiver will have. In this case, he will answer his spouse, as he did his mother, Woman, my hour is not yet come. There are times and tides, wherein the Spirit Moves; as it is said of Sampson, The spirit of the Lord moved him at times in the camp of Dan: The angel of the Lord, not always, but at a certain season went down and moved the waters.
Now these times and seasons are in his own hands, and it is not in the souls power, to know and appoint them. Therefore as the eyes of the handmaids are to the hands of her mistress, so must the eyes of the spouse be to her Lord, until he regard her. Her part is patience and attendance, and the patient abiding of the righteous shall not perish for ever. Psalm 37:34 When the soul has submitted her will unto his will, the Lords hour will shortly come, wherein the bitter water will turn sweet when the wood is present. The water of cold desertions will be turned to warming comfortable wine of joyful visitations.
When your Lord has the honor and service due to a most free and wise giver, then will you have the crown of your patience and attendance. For God has given his word, that those which honor him he will honor: and again, “wait on the Lord, and commit your way to him, and he will bring it to pass” A blessed waiting which honors the Lord, and blesses his handmaid: and a blessed absence, that procures this waiting which draws his presence, accompanied with blessedness.
But take heed that your patience be not the effect of dulness or neglect, nor a cause of idleness: be not patient in the absence of our husband, because you care not for his presence: desire his presence above all earthly joys Song 1:2. and the shining of his countenance above all corn and wine. But let your patience be merely grounded in a submission to his will; and let his will be the cause that you will is content to want that which above all the world it desires. and this desire you may express in prayers, praying to drink the cup of salvation, as Christ prayed not to drink the cup of his passion; but with Christ’s reservation, even with a will submitted to the will of God: not when I will, but when you will. You may say unto him, my soul theists for God, even for the living God. Psalm 42:2
And you may fight out this longing unto your Saviour, When will you come unto me? And you may look for him more than they that watch for the morning, even more than they that watch for the morning. For blessed will you be if when he comes he find you watching; that so when he knocks you may readily open, and he may readily enter; and that buh your slackness he does not turn away tot he flocks of your companions.
And in the second place take heed that you give not yourself over to a desperate idleness, to doing nothing, because you can not do as you would. This were a double offense, bothe because it is impatience, and because it is idleness. This is to cut off the hands because they are feeble, Hebrews 12:12. and because the feet halt, to turn them out of the way. But it is far better to strengthen your weak hands, and that you may do by exercise, though it be but weak exercise: and it were better for you to halt in the right way, than to run or rest in a false way.
Wherefore if you can’t do the higher works, do the lower; for doing is you way, though you go but softly in it, but idleness is a false way. And when you master, Lord and Husband comes, and finds you doing according to that which you have, you will be blessed in you deed, by him, who accepts our work, if it comes from a will mind, 2 Cor. 8:12, according to that which we have, and not according to that which we have not. If you are faithful in little, he will make you ruler over much; you masters joy will shortly enter into you, and you will shortly enter into you masters joy. But contrarily look for no gain from idleness, but the gain of loss and punishment. You may lose the one your heart loves temporarily, and though you may lose him the longer, the less you do please him; yea he may come unto you with a rod, when you expect him to come with the Spirit of meekness and consolation.
To the workers he comes with a penny, even with a reward, favor, and a good eye; but to the idlers he comes with a frown. Why stand ye all the day idle? Rather do that which may win him to come, do the works at first or by doing nothing you will keep him from coming, or make him angry when he comes. And if you ask what you will do; the most ordinary work is the work of you ordinary calling, yet may you give times and turns to those works that more immediately concern you heavenly calling, even such as immediately call for you heavenly Lord to come into you soul: sigh and pray, and read and hear, and by heavenly meditations let you soul be trimmed as a bride that looks for her husband: yea with you earthly labors may you mix these heavenly thought; you may work and sigh, work and wish, work and pray in short ejaculations: and thus working, and thus waiting, working in profitable duties, and waiting with submissive patience, he that loves both your works and our patience will come to you, and say, I know your patience and your works: yea he will come with such an increase of grace, that he will also say, your last will be more than the first.
6th finally, These desertions are advantageous to the soul, while they draw her eye and affection from this world and place of interruption of joys, to the place of incessant and everlasting joys.
The Bridegroom here does but look upon the soul as through a lattice, through a lattice, and the soul beholds his beauty but by glimpses, but in His Kingdom she will see him face to face; and this beholding as it is full, for it will also be perpetual. The soul is here walled up in a house of clay, and the traffic between her an her husband is but by some chink which the Spirit has bored. But this clay which is now in itself nothing but darkness, and keeps out light, shall hereafter be made all glorious and lightsome; Yea whereas the soul is now much carnal, then the body shall be made spiritual; and if the body be spiritual and lightsome, how pure and spiritual will the soul be which is now a Spirit; Surely then will we be as it were all eye, even all clarity and purity, and so most capable of light and glory: and according to the capacity of our receiving, shall the light, and glory, and joy of our husband enter into us, and fill us:
And of this fulness of joy and glory there is no end, no interruption. Wherefore our husband wisely and profitably, draws us by these desertions, from earnests unto full fruition; from broken pieces to whole and entire joys. If the soul might still have these glimpses, she would perchance be contented with them: and this were no other than to be contented with perpetual star-light, eve a light fitted for this life of vanity, which is but a night, being compared to the bright day of eternity. Yet laying in the bed of love, she would be content to look on her beloved by this lesser light, and would not desire the perfect day, whirring the Sun of glory might arise unto her; and by a large and glorious light, make her largely and gloriously to see him, who is the fountain of that large and light, by which she sees him.
Wherefore this lesser light is profitably taken from her, to stir her up to the seeking of the greater; and her beloved does chastise her by desertions, to beat her away from resting in lesser, and interrupted joys, and to beat her unto the seeking of fuller loves, mightier joys, and everlasting fruitions. And indeed the earnests should have taught her this lesson, but because they did not, these interruptions are sometimes sent to teach it her. The earnests should have taught her, to look out for the full exhibition of that whereof they are earnests; but because the soul instead of looking by them, beyond them, fastens and stays her eye on them, they are taken from that eye which was unduly stayed on them, that so by lacking them it may look beyond them, which it should have done, but did not by them. and now the soul seeing that these earnests are not only but drops and parcels of an infinite fulness, but with all drops and parcels, set forth; and his actions are answerable to his name.
This is page 133-179
Page 179-237 Five Benefits of the earnests, visitations, more light etc.
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